A Heart Full of Daisies

"A good friend is a connection to life - a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world."  ~Lois Wyse

I went to Walmart today with my grandmother. I originally went to look for some household items, but when we arrived we discovered they were having a HUGE sale on all flowers and plants. My grandmother is all about pink flowers. Now, I love flowers of any kind, but for some reason, my grandmother is only partial to pink ones. I'm sure she would argue with me about this, but if you venture up to her apartment and check out the assortment of flower pots on her balcony, you will see that there is nothing but a sea of pink. Obviously, once she saw this sale she was immediately on a mission to take home a few more pink buds. As I patiently waited for her to make her choices, I glanced over the assortment of pretties and wished I could buy every daisy in the bunch. I love daisies. 

This got me thinking about the 8th friend on my Limp Along List, Erin.

As previously mentioned in my Inez blog, I worked in a Hallmark store for what seemed like an eternity. I began the fall of my freshman year in college and worked up until the day before Destiny was born. 7 years, 3 months and 16 days exactly. You cannot imagine the stories I could tell you from those 7 years and maybe one day I will do so. As I look back, I can't believe how much my life changed in those 7 years and how much I took away from that experience. But, one of the best things I got out of it was my friend, Erin. She was a 16 year old girl, wearing flip-flops and a skirt and having no clue what she was getting herself into. You may not think that working in a card shop would require any sort of labor, but when you are the only 2 people under the age of 60 who work there, ALL of the labor becomes your job. She never wore flip-flops or a skirt again after her 1st day.  :)

By the time Erin came to work, I had been there at least 4 years. I was glad to have someone younger to chat with during the non-busy hours, but as I got to know her, I realized I had an obligation to her. J and I were engaged and soon-to-be youth pastors. I was determined to live in a way that would represent my beliefs without being pushy or judgmental and I felt as if I needed to be a representation in every area of my life. I had days when all I wanted to do was cuss every customer out and display certain hand gestures to my fellow employees. I was guilty on more than one occasion of grumbling about things I disagreed with or letting out my frustrations on unsuspecting old ladies. But, I had to remind myself that this young girl was watching me and maybe, in a way, looking up to me. 

As I previously confessed in my Feth blog, I hate attention but such things are inexcusable in my family. Here is another confession: I spent a large part of my life running from the inevitable responsibility that was given to me at an early age...the responsibility of being a leader and not a follower, of being an example to all who looked at me. It took me a long time to understand that I didn't have to be perfect, just willing to be used by God. I didn't have to be resentful of the "preacher's kid" fishbowl, but I did need to remember that I was a reflection of my family and I needed to walk the walk, not just talk the talk. When Erin came into my life, I was ready for her. :)

We stood behind the counter one night and talked about a new movie that had come out. Erin said when she went to see the movie with friends that she found it very interesting. The movie was "The Passion of The Christ" and her exact words were, "I had never heard that story before." I was floored. Story? Never heard of the crucifixion? How is this possible? She started asking questions and I started answering them. I invited her to church and she's been there ever since. I was amazed at her faith and her lack of fear. She jumped in with both feet and never looked back. I learned that her life hadn't been the easiest, that she had her share of trouble, but she never let her past bring her down. We kept working together and going to church together and before long we were true friends. 

I have 2 favorite things about Erin: 1) her heart and 2) her perspective. Her heart is massive and always filled with joy. Erin finds joy in everything. She doesn't just "like" something, she loves it. And her perspective...she smiles not because life is perfect, but because of the tiny perfections she looks for everyday. I can tell her the most awful thing and she comes up with a totally different outlook...usually a happy one. :) Erin loves the color pink, Brad Paisley, lemonade and daisies. Yep, like a lot of other things, we share a love for daisies. For me, a daisy represents simple beauty. There are no frills or fancy petals. One daisy can make me smile just by looking at it. Erin finds that same simple beauty in every circumstance and every phase of life. Her big heart is full of daisies.

I left Erin to run the show at Hallmark. She was there the night Desi was born and I watched her walk down the aisle 6 months later. She told me as soon as she found out she was pregnant with her first, Elijah, and trusted me enough to watch him everyday for the first 2 years of his life. She was there the night Emery was born and I will be there when her daughter is born in a few short weeks. Well, I might be a little late considering Elijah is spending the night with us. :) We talk everyday and hopefully will pick up walking together again after the baby comes. But, no matter what insanity is taking place in my life, Erin is always there to remind me of the daisies. 

So, for that, I say thank you.

Thank you for the dessert, the inspiration, the unconditional love and the muffin tins. Thank you for listening and for allowing me to be me. I had no idea when you applied at Hallmark all those years ago that you would turn out to be such a treasure and a most valued friend. You have blessed me, amazed me and proven that it's all in the way you look at it. You could let your heart become filled with not-so-pretty things, and you would be more than justified, but instead you choose to fill it with grace and hope. I marvel at the woman you have become. I love you, Munchkin!

P.S. Yay pink!